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Post image for Prisoners (Script) — Review

No scripts today, rather a review of (a hot) one.
Prisoners is a spec script by Aaron Guzikowski that sold for about a gazillion dollars.

The story is about “a Boston family-man (Keller Dover) whose 6-year-old daughter with her best friend are kidnapped,” as THR puts it.
Unsatisfied with the work of the lead detective (Loki), the father takes matters into his own hands by kidnapping the man he thinks is responsible for the young girls’ demise to find out where they are. Loki meanwhile is trying to unravel the truth behind the kidnappings.

Three big names were attached to the project.
Mark Wahlberg as Dover and Christian Bale as Loki, with Bryan Singer set to direct.
Unfortunately, the deal fell flat on its face only a couple of weeks ago when Alcon acquired Prisoners.
It is very unfortunate.
I’m sure Christian Bale could have pulled the Loki style. The character seems like a modern version of Public Enemies’ Melvin Purvis (albeit with more intensity). On the other hand, Keller Dover is an unusual role for Mark Wahlberg. It would have been an exciting part for him.

The basic premise might seem a bit rehashed but Guzikowski actually does bring an interesting and fresh execution to the storyline.
Although good, the script is definitely not the great movie I was expecting to read given its high buzz (and dollars thrown at it).

Steven Zeitchik over at his Risky Riz Blog described it as “a real page-turner.“
Even if I agree regarding the fact that the last forty pages get you involved, I had a lot of trouble entering the world of our characters, mainly in the first third of the film. I dare say the beginning is almost boring.
Guzikowski in my opinion takes too much time setting up his characters and going into the meat of what we’re waiting for.
To give you an idea, the “kidnapping the kidnapper” storyline, even though it’s supposed to be the major part of the movie, begins just before the middle of the script is reached.
As for the more mysterious elements surrounding the kidnapping(s), they’re only introduced twenty or so pages later (with forty remaining). Pretty late in the game for me.
This is a bit more problematic considering that in true Hollywood fashion, the movie should be described as “Seven meets Saw with a hint of Mystic River.”

The first two films are especially true regarding the overal tone of Prisoners. The ambiance is indeed very dark; there are no jokes which makes for a heavy read, even until the end.
In addition, the mystery complexifies and deepens as the story progresses.
I’m still unsure about a couple of details, and unfortunately there seem to be both loose threads and pointless clues (not red herring). There’s this creepy running theme around mazes that is never really explained even though it could have led to some great pay-offs.
Fortunately though you’re kept guessing as to what’s going to our characters until the very end (in the same way as the first Saw ended sort of).

The characters are well-defined, and I had this Mystic River vibe going on as both movies are set in Boston and the parents are both blue-collar-type in similar situations. There’s an overarching dread throughout the story as well.
I’m interested in seeing who plays the mother as they do have “juicy part” like Zeitchik puts it.

In the end, despite a weak first act, the dark thriller that is Prisoners has a strong enough hold that it keeps you waiting until the very end, if anything just because you want to know who did it and why.
Alcon Entertainment is currently fast-tracking production on the project for a release slated around October 2010.
Here’s to hoping the new cast will do justice to the script.


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Post image for Don Bluth: The Man who would not scream “Eek-A-Mouse”
Hey again, Lordofnoyze here with an unusual look at one overlooked master of animation. Now, for this blog, I will talk about a time way before DreamWorks Animation and Pixar, way before 3-D (well, as we know it or we are about to know it…I see you, James). Ever since the launch of Walt Disney Studios, in the 1930s, the Mouse firm maintained a strong domination in terms of animation feature films. (Warner Bros. and Universal only competed in short films).
That is, until the 1980s, when a renegade director born in El Paso, Texas (*insert Clint Eastwood music here*) took the challenge to direct animation feature films and fight Dinsey on their own turf.

The first Don Bluth-directed movie was for MGM, a little movie called “Brisby and The Secret of Nimh”. It was adapted from a Robert O’Brien book, that may have its second coming on screen thanks to Paramount and Neil Burger (but this time, it would be live-action…with a little CGI enhancement, of course).

It was followed by two videogames: “Dragon’s Lair”, and “Space Ace”. But Don Bluth hit the jackpot when he associated with Steven Spielberg and Universal. The results were two of the better-remembered 80’s kids flicks: “An American Tail” in 1986, and “The Land Before Time” in 1988. It spawned two franchises built around the heroes, Fievel the Mouse from the West, and Littlefoot. Fievel had one theatrical sequel, and two direct-to-video sequels. Littlefoot returned in a staggering 12 video sequels (!!!), the most recent dating way back to 2007. Both also had animated shows, and proved worth a lot of money for Universal.

This is where I pause. You know the first time when I cried while watching a movie? Nope, it sure wasn’t “Bambi”. It was the earthquake scene of “The Land Before Time”, when Littlefoot loses his mother. It was disturbing as hell to me, and it was the first time where I realised my own mortality, as well as the ones around me. Needless to say, putting four orphan dinosaurs put into situations of danger, all while grieving, took a lot of balls. It made for a highly emotional movie, that disputed any of the Disney classics.

Shortly after that, Bluth reunited with MGM for his most daring movie yet, “All Dogs Go To Heaven”. And if you thought that “The Land Before Time” had dark subject matter, I present to you the IMDB pitch.

A dog returns from the dead looking for revenge on his killer using an orphan
girl who can talk to animals.

Yes, we’re talking about a G-rated movie.

And a kind soul put the ending on YouTube, so to all of you that are not afraid of spoilers (right…like you cared about this movie until now), enjoy the imagery.

I mean…

Come on.
The movie was the first one produced under his new Sullivan Bluth Studios in Ireland. Right after the average box office scores, trouble began. Right after finding trouble in investments, and having a hard time distributing “Rock-A-Doodle”, his final movie for the Lion Firm, Bluth signed a deal with Warner Animation Studios, a newly founded wing destined to produce animation movies…and also compete with Disney. He produced two movies under the Warner banner: an adaptation of “Thumbelina”, one of Hans Christian Andersen’s tales, and “The Pebble and The Penguin”. The first one did good, the second one was a flop, critically and commercially.

Bluth had to wait until 1997 until luck found him again. 20th Century Fox appointed him and Gary Goldman to be chairmen of Fox Animation Studios, also a new division destined to compete with Disney and soon-to-be-open DreamWorks Animation. The success of “Anastasia”, with voices from Meg Ryan, John Cusack and Kelsey Grammer, led to a DTV sequel around Bartok the rat (again). But the phenomenal flop of “Titan A.E.” in 2000, scripted by three screenwriters well-known of us geeks, John August, Ben Edlund and Joss Whedon, led to an early retirement.

Now he’s opened his own website, donbluth.com, and his Don Bluth Films based in Phoenix, AZ, produces content for Web and IPhones alike.

OK, so…what’s my point?

Well, Bluth is a forgotten “artisan” that always stayed true to 2-D animation, and if you can see anything in his movies, it’s uncompromising (and yes, often dark) subject matter. But even if seeing it with very young kids is not a very good idea, it stays great to rediscover an alternative to rosy-colored, two-dimensional characters. I mean, for crissakes, the dogs in “Charlie” gamble, and it’s set in 1930s New Orleans, Vice City before Miami claimed that crown!!! But think about it: if there weren’t any Bluth movies, would Disney execs have accepted a pitch where an old man goes on a quest for adventure when his wife dies of illness?

(Well…they probably would have, since it’s Pixar. But you get my point.)

So, here’s my 2 cents to respect the artist. And I’ll leave you with a few in-depth links:
- Interview to IGN back when Titan A.E. was released

Oh, and a lot of his movies may be available on the YouTubes.

I said “may”.
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Based in Southwest France, Lordy is a local reporter in all areas of France (really, look it up). As a hobby though, he has a keen and often deconstructing look on the entertainment business, even as a simple fan. — You can follow him on @lordofnoyze






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Post image for Better Off Ted: Better Living Through Comedy

Hello, Blog Nation. My name is Lordofnoyze, alias Lordy, and I have the honor to be the first guest blogger of TV Calling, so I hope to be up to the task. Either that, or I’m off answering calls in a Madagascar-based hotline company. And nobody wants that, especially not the fellow employees there.

I’m a French (former?) student about to embark in a career of journalism. But as a side hobby, ever since my teenage years, I’ve developed an unhealthy addiction for all things TV and TV shows. Soon, the voices in my…..er, I’ve been compelled to write about the good, the bad and the ugly in the now-defunct website “Ligue des Téléspectateurs Extraordinaires”, where I was getting a kick out at reviewing shows like “Boston Public”, “X-Files” or “American Dreams”. But college life, and the aforementioned closure of the site, got in the way, and after a (mostly) failed attempt at starting my own personal blog, I went on hiatus. Until today.

Also, I love pop and hip-hop music, so if you see a few “clever” musical references in some of the blogs, it’s not by pure randomness. And I love inserting them, especially when Lex is not looking. So, without further ado, here’s my first, show-and-prove blog.

For my first guest blog, I thought it would be a good idea to talk about an underrated, and below-the-radar comedy of this year. It just happens to close its season on July 28, burning off the 5 last episodes in summer. A usual move for shows that are cancelled (hello, Pushing Daisies! Dirty Sexy Money! Eli Stone!) , but not when the show is being renewed. I’m talking about “Better Off Ted”, one of the many ABC’s midseason entries (remember In The Motherhood? Yeah, me neither.)

A show that premiered somewhere in March, with little fanfare, and was paired with “Scrubs” on Wednesdays, just before “Lost”. Of course, it attracted under 5 million viewers, and 7 episodes were aired during the “normal” season. The show was as good as dead, but Steve McPherson and his army of drones considered there was “something” there and decided to save the show until Midseason 2010, where it will be paired with the new, almost-JD-less “Scrubs: TNG”, a.k.a. “Scrubs: the Yung, Hip, Med School Years”.

So what was that “something”? Did McPherson lose his mind?

Well, as all network presidents, he’s already genetically insane. But he’s right to keep the show on the air. Here’s why:

Set in the headquarters of a fictional multinational company called Veridian Dynamics, “Better Off Ted” is barely hilarious. No, it’s not the second coming of “Arrested Development”, even if it features a top-notch, pitch-perfect performance of Portia De Rossi as the cutthroat boss, Veronica. But it slowly unveils a sense of absurdity and delicate lunacy that is welcomed.

The 7 first episodes are really solid, mainly thanks to a really good pace in editing and directing (CRUCIAL in comedy), and a very promising cast. The lead, Jay Harrington, is hardly recognizable, but he’s been seen in the promising thriller “The Inside” opposite Rachel Nichols, and with Tim Minear as his boss. That doesn’t tell us much about his comedy chops. But he was really good as the unlucky reporter in “Back To You”, the FOX comedy that never really delivered on its great potential. As things stand, his character, Ted, is a handsome everyman that has to handle daily crises alongside Veronica. He also has to deal with the sexual tension with Linda (comedy journeywoman Andrea Anders), and the everlasting disputes and ramblings of Phil and Lem, the scene-stealing tandem of the show.

Of course, it already seems like the comedy version of “Fringe”, with mad science aplenty. But the show works primarily because of the interaction and cracks between his characters, and the evil and outright absurdity that is Veridian Dynamics is kept in the second plan. Unless you wanna count the hilarious commercials, that illustrate the “theme” of each episode.

Plenty of credit goes to Victor Fresco, creator of “Andy Richter Controls the Universe”, another underrated gem that recently was released in DVD in the USA. But it feels like the show has yet to really deliver and free itself of the conventions, since it already has a universe of its own. For example, the lab rats that are partners of Phil and Lem, or Ted’s daughter, were barely used during the season, but are strong nevertheless.

So, if you want to check those out, the final episodes are being aired on ABC over the next few weeks. Definitely more worthy of your time than, say, the umpteenth season of “Entourage”.

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Based in Southwest France, Lordy is a local reporter in all areas of France (really, look it up). As a hobby though, he has a keen and often deconstructing look on the entertainment business, even as a simple fan. — You can follow him on @lordofnoyze






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Post image for Five games Hollywood should make into movies

Like we saw yesterday, studios are starting a new thing: board game-based movies.

I loved this great fad so much that I decided to help the poor execs by giving them a Top 5 list of games they should quickly make into movies.
The audience is just dying for ground-breaking entertainment, let’s give it to ‘em!

The choice was extremely hard to make, some plastic tokens were lost in the process, but all is well now.
Let’s dive right in.

5) Connect 4

A classic game but how could one adapt this into an Oscar-winning motion picture?

Easy. Just imagine the following pic:
“A parallel world where everything is decided via a game of Connect 4. Suddenly, throughout the globe, strange events start happening as soon as people put pieces in the Connect 4 slots.
Cows explode, buildin gs are destroyed, Ahmadinejad converts to Judaism.
One man can save us all, he’s our only hope: the world-champion of Connect 4.”

I just got chills.

4) Chinese Checkers

The clock is ticking for Denzel Washington, who must uncover the truth behind a global conspiracy that threatens international security.
A new Sino-American pact has just been signed. The pact allows trading of state secrets between the two countries.
This thrilling political thriller will shed a light on a(nother) secret society inside the U.S. Government.
Ultimately, the movie will have no relation whatsoever with the game it is based on except for the name, a clever pun.

Chinese Checkers, the new political thriller by Tony Scott, coming soon.

3) Risk

Okay, this one is more like a half-joke.
I’d genuinely be interested in seeing what movie could be based off this great board game about world conquest.
My thinking is it’s something close to Napoleon meets Michael Bay.
A global fight for land involving epic space lasers and giant elephants.
Why elephants? Why not.
That, or a movie on colonialism.

2) Scrabble

What if a secret code was hidden inside Scrabble boxes everywhere?
In deciphering this Scrabble code one would uncover what lies inside the obscure fraternal organisation known as ‘Freemascrabble’ currently ruling the world.
Think Da Vinci Code meets National Treasure but for nerds.
It’s pretty original.

If Jon Turteltaub directs this on a script by Akiva Goldsman starring Nicolas Cage, I want to see the movie now.

1) Pictionary

So many ways to adapt this pictureless (and pointless) game.
What about a family-oriented movie with kids solving a murder thanks to clues that must be drawn and guessed just to piss those damn kids off?
And best of all, the audience can participate too!
Just shout the answers to the clues at a responseless screen to play.
That’s right, you’re publicly encouraged to annoy even more your already-annoyed movie theatre neighbour.

It’s like the Mamma Mia! movie sing-along, only with pretty pictures.

Well, I think the Top 5 list is now over.
What about you? What board games would you like to see adapted on screen just for shizz and giggles?

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Post image for Hollywood’s Trivial Pursuit of Games

Monopoly, Clue, Candy Land, Battleship, Ouija Board, He-Man, Hot Wheels, Asteroids, Major Matt Manson, View-Master, and now Max Steel.

What all of these games have in common is one thing: they are all being adapted into movies.
It seems as if every second now a new game adaptation is being announced.
There’s even going to be a Where’s Waldo movie.

I feel almost insulted by all these utterly pointless and ridiculous adaptations!
Are studio execs really that desperate?
Toys are meant for the playground and board games are meant to be put in a storage closet you never go to.
They are not meant for a movie theatre.

Let’s take a look at those recent horrible, horrible acquisitions.
Bare in mind: all of them will be live-action.

Starting with a weird one (aren’t they all?): the Ouija board movie!

Produced by Michael Bay’s Plantinum Dune, the film will be penned by Elf’s David Berenbaum. It shouldn’t take the route of Jumanji, meaning it won’t be about a game coming to life. Instead, the board should play an intricate part of the movie.
This sounds a lot like that 1986 movie named Witchboard.

It looks like a joke, but it’s not. View-Master will also be a movie.
All jokes aside, Brad Caleb Kane is currently at work on the screenplay. The film will be produced by the writer-producer duo that is Kurtzman and Orci.
Kane described the movie as being similar to “the old ‘80s Amblin movies: ‘Goonies,’ ‘Young Sherlock’ … in that vein.”
I’m not too sure what the point of it all is yet, but when I do, I’ll be sure to let you guys know.

Time to make room for another car movie: Hot Wheels.
I can already imagine the fast vehicles going at 200MPH in outlandish settings.
What is even more saddening (or hilarious?) is that Joel Silver is behind the movie adaptation. If you don’t get it, let me give you a clue: Silver was also the man behind the visual mess known as Speed Racer.
See any similarities between the two projects?

Ironically, the adaptation that seems the most intriguing and potentially the best of them all is the classic board-game that is Monopoly. We very quickly talked about it when it was announced back in November. The Monopoly movie has been in development since forever ago, even before Robin Hood.
The movie will be directed by Ridley Scott and the script written by Corpse Bride/Monster House’s Pamela Pettler.
Brian Goldner, CEO of Hasbro, described the story as “real people kind of playing a real-life game of ‘Monopoly,’ not the board game, although they’re icons of the game”. As for Ridley Scott, he said the following: “We have identified a pretty good story and it is fundamentally a movie, not a game, probably describing in a way the characters in the film, the passion of the game, and how the game came about.”

Now onto action figures with He-Man, Major Matt Manson and Max Steel.

I think that toy-based movies will probably never really work. If we’re being honest for a second here, Transformers (barely) only really worked because of its VFX, and I doubt I’m shocking anyone by saying the new G.I. Joe movie is probably going to tank.
Kung-Fu Panda’s John Stevenson will direct the live-action adaptation of He-Man and the Masters of the Universe (produced by Joel Silver) based on a Justin Marks screenplay (the guy who wrote the 2009 Street Fighter). Max Steel was very recently announced so no director is yet known, though Joe Roth will produce the pic for Paramount. Major Matt Manson however is being written by Boomtown/Raines’ Graham Yost and will be played by non other than Tom Hanks.

Moving on to Candy Land. The game is extremely popular amongst youngsters. Interestingly enough though, it isn’t that well-known outside of the States, so we’ll have to see how the movie fares internationally.
The film version will be written by Etan Cohen and should be directed by Enchanted’s Kevin Lima.
There isn’t much to say about the plot except that I’m sure the film will be as thought-provoking as the game itself.
A future stoner-movie classic?

Regarding Battleship, the movie will be directed by Peter Berg.
The studio wants it to be an “epic naval action adventure”.
Yet again, I don’t see the point of forcing down the Battleship name, given the plotlessness of the game.
Let’s finally round this up with what can best be describe as…what?
A board-game adaptation? A reboot? A remake? A future Razzie Award-winner?

Penning down the correct term for this piece of cinematography is as complicated as was understanding the complex relationship that lies between the new 90210 and the new Melrose Place.

I am of course talking about the upcoming movie version of Clue. The game already had a somewhat decent 1985 version starring Tim Curry. This time around though, Gore Verbinski will be directing the film after he is finished on BioShock.
This version of the game has been described as a “global thriller and transmedia event that uses deductive reasoning as its storytelling engine.”
On the other side of things, we have video-game adaptation, which until now have all proven to be huge failures.
This post isn’t about why everyone hates Uwe Boll so I’ll abstain from going into a lengthy argument on that one. I’m also not going to list all the awful video-game adaptation, there have been so many.
Some good attempts were made in the past few years regarding video-game adaptations though, the problem being none of them came into fruition.
One of the most well-known example is Halo, which has been in development-hell since 2005.
At one point, Peter Jackson was even attached as an executive producer with Guillermo del Toro as the director.
Also, Shawn Ryan wrote a Max Payne draft in 2002.
My point is this: why would you make such shitty movies if you have something worth putting your money in?
Before being acquired by Universal, Asteroids was even in a four-studio bidding war!
Are we talking about the same game here? You know, the one where you control a triangular-shaped ship rotating left and right to fire on asteroids.

Will the tag line be “In space, no one can hear you fail”?
In any case, the Lorenzo di Bonaventura-produced film will be penned by Bedtime Stories’ screenwriter, Matt Lopez.
Good luck with that.

Honestly, studios massively buying game properties to turn them into movies just shows how lazy they are.
Bet on new talent, find new ideas, or even adapt realistic stuff, but for fuck’s sake, don’t make a movie out of game pieces!
What I don’t understand is why studios seem forced to literally adapting pieces of plastic into movies?
Sure, the brands are well-known, but the end-product will be so different from the game it’s based on that ultimately it might just do the opposite and only be a drag.
View-Master: The Movie sounds more preposterous than a whole new original idea merely vaguely using an object similar to the View-Master.
An Asteroids movie? There is no plot whatsoever in the game! Armaggeddon and Deep Impact didn’t need the permission of Atari to be made, so what changed?

A naval movie need not be attached to the Battleship name either.

Same goes for Monopoly. Assuming this will be a futuristic investment/banking movie, branding it with the über-famous game board’s name is just adding unnecessary ludicrousness to the film.
Who is taking any of these projects seriously?

And since execs are so keen on the idea of adapting plotless games into motion pictures, tune in tomorrow for my Top 5 of the best (worst?) games that should have adaptations of their own.


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